Visitation
Visitation
Visitation of the Sick
The visitation of the sick is of two types: the sick who are in their homes, and the sick who are in hospitals. And perhaps there is a third type: those who are being treated abroad. These, no doubt, are very pleased when they receive from the father priest a message to check on them, or a phone call, or a word through someone traveling to inquire about their health and the progress of their treatment.
Visiting the sick is very beneficial spiritually and psychologically.
A person in general—when sick—is close to God, seeking His mercy and asking for prayers for healing. He has a heart ready for repentance and for living with God. So your visit is not only for his physical health, but also for his spiritual benefit, with a kind word said to him for the good of his life.
And the visit to the sick is not only to see him and check on him, but also it is good to anoint him with oil and pray for him.
And the anointing with oil must not be in a routine manner.
I mean a method in which he does not feel the effectiveness of the anointing. Rather, it should be accompanied by prayers from the depth of the heart, which you can say in a voice he hears: “Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the Church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer of faith will save the sick, and the Lord will raise him up; and if he has committed sins, they will be forgiven him.” (James 5:13, 15). And also what was said about the Lord Christ: “When the sun was setting, all those who had any sick with various diseases brought them to Him; and He laid His hands on every one of them and healed them.” (Luke 4:40). And also what was mentioned in (Matthew 10:7, 8): “And as you go, preach, saying, ‘The kingdom of heaven is at hand.’ Heal the sick, cleanse lepers, raise the dead, cast out demons. Freely you have received, freely give.”
And you may add to all this prayers from yourself.
Then you anoint with the oil with all reverence and calmness, and anoint the sick and pray a good prayer for him, making him feel your love and care, with a cheerful face.
Make the sick feel your love for him and your care for him.
And be sure that your visit to him in his sickness will have its effect on his psyche, so that when he rises from his illness, he will come to thank you. And he may even become attached to the Church and its meetings because of your concern for him during his illness.
There are poor sick people who need financial help, and it is good to offer it to them.
There may also be sick people of average means, or even those whose circumstances are comfortable, but the costs of sickness have exhausted them greatly, and they need financial assistance. This can be offered in a quiet and non-embarrassing manner, such as the Church paying the hospital for the treatment or for part of it without anyone knowing. Or with the ordinary poor patient, you may take the prescription and bring him the medicine. And how easy it is to say to the patient cheerfully, “Let us take the blessing of bringing the medicine,” “At least so that we may pray over it…”
In some cases, the sick person may receive Communion from the Holy Mysteries.
Some sick people request this blessing themselves, or their relatives request it for them. Or the father priest may propose to visit the sick person and give him Communion. On the condition that the sick person feels that Communion is a blessing for him, helping in his healing… because some sick people may be troubled and imagine that a person receives Communion only if his death is near!
In the case of Communion, you should inform the patient of the time, so that he may prepare spiritually, at least with repentance and clearing his heart before God. He also prepares by fasting as much as his treatment allows.
Communion of the sick has a special rite, which is not our topic here.
At least, the priest reads the absolution for the sick person, and says the Confession Prayer which is at the end of the Liturgy (and it may be in Coptic if it is a public hospital). Then he gives Communion to the sick person and concludes the Communion.
Visitation of the Absent
If the priest visits all the people in general, then the visitation of the absent has special priority and special importance.
And the absent sometimes have particular sensitivity.
For one of them may say: “I have been absent for such a long time, and no one from the Church asked about me, nor did anyone care about me!” And you may not visit him, while someone from another denomination visits him, and he compares! And this may have an effect on him.
The absent whom you visit are of various types:
Some have been absent from the Church altogether, or have been absent from the meetings they used to attend, or absent from Communion, or absent from Confession, or from important occasions.
The important thing is that you notice that he has been absent.
The Lord Christ, to Him be glory, was able to notice the absence of just one whom He did not see among a hundred in His fold (Luke 15). So the priest who cares for his flock, one by one, can notice the absence of a certain person: either during Communion, or from the Confession notebook, or during his distribution of the Luqma al-Baraka (the Eulogia), or by the absence of this person from his usual seat, or through some servants or deacons who inform the father priest about the absent so that he may visit them. Or because he deliberately absented himself after a quarrel between him and one of the workers in the Church…
If you do not visit this absent one, the devil may visit him!!
And it is known about the devil that he is opportunistic. Or bad companions may visit him to lead him into other ways. Or certain problems may visit him, or thoughts that trouble him because you did not visit him…
And the reason for his absence may be a state of spiritual lukewarmness, which may grow or deepen if no one rescues him from it. Or he may be sick and needs someone to visit him and ask about him according to the commandment of the Lord Christ (Matthew 25:36, 43). Or he may be in a problem and needs someone to stand by him… Or his absence from the Church may be the beginning of a worse development… The important thing is that his visitation is a necessity of great importance.
Some father priests have in their Church a visitation committee.
This committee informs him about who is absent and his circumstances: whether he is traveling, sick, troubled, has a problem, has begun to deviate, was lured by another denomination, is hindered by family reasons, work reasons, time reasons, or has had an accident, or failed an exam and is embarrassed to come to Church, or is upset because God did not help him (according to his thinking)!!
We said that the father priest visits the sick and the absent. And whom else?
Those Who Have Problems
These are certainly known to him: either because they presented written or verbal complaints to him, or news of them reached him, or they approached the social service committee, or they have family problems that reached the Ecclesiastical Council, or they have financial problems, or certain calamities befell them.
These he not only visits, but above all works to solve their problems.
He stands by them in their distress, and carries for them all that he can carry. And he says as the Lord, to Him be glory, said: “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28). And he should also pray for them, so that God may intervene and solve their problems.
How deep are the prayers that the priest says in Midnight Praise:
For everyone, with amazing and varied details, he says:
“Save, O Lord, Your people… Save those in hardships, tribulations, and sorrows… Comfort the faint-hearted… Deliver us, O Master, from evil trials and the trap of snares, visible and invisible… Remember, O Lord, the orphans and widows, the isolated and the helpless, and those who have no one to remember them… those in dungeons and prisons, those in captivity and exile, the bound and those tied by the bonds of authorities and demons…”
The priest with the open eye and the wide heart deals with all tenderness and positivity with the distressed in his people.
And he visits them not by mere visiting, but by working for their sake. And as it is said in the Book of Isaiah: he brings good news to the poor, binds up the brokenhearted, proclaims liberty to the captives, and release to the prisoners… and comforts all who mourn (Isaiah 61:1, 2).
And as the priest visits the sick, the absent, the distressed, and those with problems…
He also visits his people in liturgical occasions:
Blessing of Homes
Our fathers used to, before they lived in a new dwelling, ask the father priest to bless it and pray in it before living in it. And for this there is a fixed rite in the Church called “Blessing of New Homes.” If you do not have it, I will print it, God willing, and send it to you…
In this rite he also prays over the water and sprinkles it in the house.
He anoints this water in the name of the Trinity and sprinkles it in the house, in all its rooms, while saying: “Houses of prayer, houses of purity, houses of blessing, grant them, O Lord, to us and to Your servants who come after us forever,” as in the Litany of the Meetings… He also sprinkles the people of the house with the water…
He sprinkles water on the doors and also on the walls. And he should take care not to sprinkle this water on the floor on which they will walk with their feet, since it is water blessed by prayer. And he may also sprinkle the beds and desks and bless them. But he does not sprinkle in the bathroom.
The rite of blessing homes may be repeated.
Not only for new homes, but for any home, especially if it is the first time the priest visits this home, even if it is old… And there are father priests who, as soon as they enter a house, say peace to this house according to the Lord’s command to His disciples (Matthew 10:12, 13).
And the rite of blessing homes is not limited only to prayer and sprinkling water…
It is accompanied, without doubt, by a spiritual session with the people of the house. It is not a mere formal visit in which the priest prays and leaves. How difficult it is for some to embarrass him—while he is leaving—saying: “Will you come, our father, and leave without saying a spiritual word to us?!”
The Oil Lamp (Kandeel) Prayer
It differs from the rite of blessing homes in that the father priest prays it while fasting.
And the people of the house who are anointed with the Kandeel oil are also supposed to be fasting. Therefore, many father priests pray the Kandeel in homes during the Great Lent to ensure the fasting of the household.
In any case, the Kandeel can be done on any day, provided there is agreement on the time to ensure fasting. And the Kandeel prayer is the “Sacrament of Anointing of the Sick.” Therefore, its primary purpose is for the sick. But people are accustomed to taking its blessing even without sickness, as happens on the Friday of the end of the Fast, when a general Kandeel is held for all the people—sick and healthy—and all are anointed with the oil prayed over.
And the Kandeel prayer in homes is an opportunity for visitation and for caring for the household in which it is held. And it is not appropriate for it to be limited to just prayer and the anointing with oil.
We now speak about another group visited by the father priest, which is:
Families of the Departed
It is known that the family of the departed needs comfort, and also needs pastoral care…
Thus, the priest must visit them to console them. And the first visitation is usually on the day of the death. Then comes the “Third Day Prayer,” which is also meant for comfort, reassuring the family of the departed that their loved one will rise as the Lord Christ rose on the third day. Therefore, the Gospel of the rite of the Third Day Prayer is about the resurrection from the dead…
But comforting the family of the departed is not limited to the rite.
Nor is the mere visit on the first and third day enough. They need continued visitation until the atmosphere becomes almost normal again. And of course, there will be many consolers in the house. Here the duty of the father priest is to say a word or direct the conversation in a way beneficial to all…
And if the departed was the head of the family, the matter requires special care for his widow and orphaned children, and ensuring that their needs are arranged after the death of their provider… The family indeed needs guidance regarding the many matters that follow death, such as financial matters of inheritance and pension, household responsibilities, and the involvement of some members of the extended family.
Other Reasons
There are other reasons and occasions for visitation, among them:
1 – Visiting those who request the father priest to visit them.
He is supposed to fulfill their request. And I want to mention here two remarks:
A – The visit must be spiritual, not merely affection or social work.
B – It must not affect the visitation of others, lest some monopolize the father priest and continually request him to visit them, while others are neglected. Such consecutive visits would then become a stumbling block.
2 – Visits on certain occasions.
Such as a birthday, a wedding anniversary, a success occasion, or an occasion of travel or return from travel, or any particular matter that calls for a visit.
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