Silence and Speech
In the previous issue we spoke about the benefits of silence, and about good speech and its conditions. We mentioned six conditions for good speech by which we can win people.
Today we would like to continue our talk on the subject:
The Word of the Lord in Their Mouths:
When the sons of God spoke, they did not utter their own personal expressions; rather, they spoke the word of God which He placed in their mouths.
They used to pray and ask for the prayers of the people, that the Lord might give them a word to speak.
For the Apostle Paul says to the Ephesians:
“Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for all the saints—and for me, that utterance may be given to me, that I may open my mouth boldly to make known the mystery of the gospel…” (Eph. 6:18–20).
And he says to the Colossians:
“Continue earnestly in prayer, being vigilant in it with thanksgiving; meanwhile praying also for us, that God would open to us a door for the word, to speak the mystery of Christ” (Col. 4:2–4).
And because the apostles were taking the word from God, therefore the word was growing, as the Scripture says: “And the word of God grew” (Acts 6:7) (Acts 12:24) (Acts 19:20). And they were speaking the word of God with all boldness (Acts 4:31).
How beautiful is the experience of the prophet Jeremiah in this, as he says:
“Then the Lord put forth His hand and touched my mouth, and the Lord said to me: ‘Behold, I have put My words in your mouth’” (Jer. 1:9).
This is also similar to what the Lord said to the prophet Isaiah:
“As for Me,” says the Lord, “this is My covenant with them: My Spirit who is upon you, and My words which I have put in your mouth, shall not depart from your mouth, nor from the mouth of your descendants, nor from the mouth of your descendants’ descendants, says the Lord, from this time and forevermore” (Isa. 59:21).
And thus it also happened with the prophet Moses, when he excused himself for being slow of speech and slow of tongue. The Lord said to him:
“Now therefore, go, and I will be with your mouth and teach you what you shall say” (Exod. 4:10–12).
God spoke upon the mouths of Moses, Jeremiah, and Isaiah, and He was placing the words in their mouths, and they were uttering them. Therefore the Apostle Paul said:
“Christ speaking in me” (2 Cor. 13:3).
And the Lord Jesus Christ said:
“But when they deliver you up, do not worry about how or what you should speak. For it will be given to you in that hour what you should speak; for it is not you who speak, but the Spirit of your Father who speaks in you” (Matt. 10:19–20) (Mark 13:11) (Luke 12:11).
Therefore ask yourself every time you speak: Is it you who are speaking, or the Spirit of God who is in you? If Christ were in your place, would He say this speech that you are saying now, and in this manner and tone, and with this voice, and with the same feeling?
If God is the One speaking in you, you cannot err…
And you cannot regret a word you have spoken. On the contrary, your words will have great benefit.
Look: Christ, who is the Word of God and the Wisdom of the Father, when He spoke, did not speak from Himself, but said to the Father:
“I have given them Your word. The words which You gave Me I have given them” (John 17).
Can you also say to the Lord every time you speak: “The words which You gave me I have given them”? No doubt then you will not err.
The friends of Job were blamed because they spoke from themselves, according to their human wisdom, and did not wait until the Lord placed a word in their mouths. Therefore the prophet rebuked them saying:
“Miserable comforters are you all!” (Job 16:2)
“Oh, that you would be silent, and it would be your wisdom!” (Job 13:5).
Examples of Wise Speech:
Among the examples of speech filled with wisdom, humility, and winning people, are the words of Jacob to Esau, as he was returning from his uncle Laban.
God had appeared to Jacob more than once and blessed him (Gen. 28:13–15). And Jacob had heard his father’s blessing in which he said: “Let peoples serve you, and nations bow down to you. Be master over your brethren, and let your mother’s sons bow down to you” (Gen. 27:29). And yet we find him, despite these promises, meeting Esau with great humility.
He bowed to him seven times—he to whom it was said, “Let your mother’s sons bow down to you.” And he said to Esau: “To find favor in the sight of my lord… Please take my blessing that is brought to you, because I have seen your face as though I had seen the face of God, and you were pleased with me” (Gen. 33:8–10).
He called him “my lord,” while it had been said to him, “Be master over your brethren.”
This wonderful humility and this humble speech melted Esau’s hard heart, so that he fell on his neck and kissed him, and they wept…
Jacob denied himself, forgot his dignity and what he had received of blessing and promises, and spoke to Esau with humility, although before that he had wrestled with God and prevailed (Gen. 32:24–28).
Speech of politeness and humility can win people. But harsh, wounding speech causes the loss of many.
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And among these examples of wise speech is the address of the Apostle Paul to the people of Athens. He entered the city, and his spirit was provoked within him when he saw that the city was full of idols (Acts 17:16). And despite this, the Apostle Paul did not rebuke the Athenians for their many idols, but rather tried to win them with wisdom and with speech that contained praise.
He said to them: “Men of Athens, I perceive that in all things you are very religious; for as I was passing through and considering the objects of your worship, I even found an altar with this inscription: TO THE UNKNOWN GOD. Therefore, the One whom you worship without knowing, Him I proclaim to you” (Acts 17:22–23).
Paul knew how to speak to people and how to win them.
And with this wise manner, Abigail was able to rebuke David gently, with praise and humility. She won his soul for the Lord, and she won him.
She did not say to him a blunt, wounding word of rebuke, although he was about to kill her husband Nabal and plunder all his possessions (1 Sam. 25).
Rather, “she fell at his feet and said: ‘On me, my lord, on me let this iniquity be! And please let your maidservant speak in your ears, and hear the words of your maidservant.’” And she apologized to him and attacked what Nabal had done.
She spoke to David with rebuke hidden within praise.
“And now, my lord, as the Lord lives and as your soul lives, since the Lord has held you back from coming to bloodshed and from avenging yourself with your own hand…” She made him feel that he was on the verge of shedding blood and avenging himself.
Then, with great humility, she presented to him the gifts that he had requested from Nabal and was about to kill him because of not presenting them, saying:
“And now this present which your maidservant has brought to my lord, let it be given to the young men who follow my lord.” She did not make him feel that she was giving him while he was hungry, but rather that it was a gift for his servants.
And in all this she insisted on expressions such as “my lord,” “your maidservant,” “your handmaid.” And she continued:
“Please forgive the trespass of your maidservant. For the Lord will certainly make for my lord an enduring house, because my lord fights the battles of the Lord, and evil is not found in you throughout your days. Yet a man has risen to pursue you and seek your life, but the life of my lord shall be bound in the bundle of the living with the Lord your God; and the lives of your enemies He shall sling out, as from the pocket of a sling.”
And amid these introductions full of humility, praise, appreciation, and good prayer, she returned to repeat her warning to him of his mistakes with gentleness and love, saying:
“And it shall come to pass, when the Lord has done for my lord according to all the good that He has spoken concerning you, and has appointed you ruler over Israel, that this will be no grief to you, nor offense of heart to my lord, either that you have shed blood without cause, or that my lord has avenged himself. But when the Lord has dealt well with my lord, then remember your maidservant” (1 Sam. 25).
She did not flatter David at all. Rather, she praised him truthfully, and rebuked him in love and gentleness. She did not make him feel enmity or contempt in her rebuke, but mixed her rebuke with appreciation, reverence, tenderness, compassion, and humility.
Thus this wise woman presented to us a wonderful example of the manner of speech and conduct, surpassing her husband who responded to David’s servants with pride: “Who is David, and who is the son of Jesse?… Shall I take my bread and my water and my meat… and give it to men when I do not know where they are from?”
This woman, by her wisdom, was able to correct her husband’s mistake, calm David’s anger, win the entire situation, and receive David’s praise, who said to her:
“Blessed is the Lord… who sent you this day to meet me! And blessed is your advice and blessed are you, because you have kept me this day from coming to bloodshed and from avenging myself with my own hand…”
An article by His Holiness Pope Shenouda III – Al-Keraza Magazine – Seventh Year (Issue No. 5), 30-1-1976.
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