Church Attendance Etiquette
Come with Love
The Psalmist says, “O Lord, I have loved the beauty of Your house and the place where Your glory dwells” (Ps. 26:8). This is one of the phrases the bishop says during the consecration of a new altar. The Psalmist also says:
“How lovely are Your tabernacles, O Lord of hosts! My soul longs, yes, even faints for the courts of the Lord” (Ps. 84:1–2).
He goes to the house of the Lord with longing, yearning, and love—with all the emotions of his heart. Therefore, he benefits from being there and blesses the servants of the Lord who dwell in His house, such as monks and altar servers, saying: “Blessed are those who dwell in Your house; they will still be praising You” (Ps. 84:4).
The Psalmist also rejoices at coming to the house of the Lord: “I was glad when they said to me, ‘Let us go into the house of the Lord’” (Ps. 122:1).
Those who rejoice to go to the house of the Lord surely sit there with all their hearts and emotions, absorbing every spiritual benefit. From his joy, the Psalmist even longed to dwell there forever, saying:
“One thing I have desired of the Lord, that will I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord and to inquire in His temple” (Ps. 27:4).
The Holiness of the House of the Lord
You must feel, when you are in the house of the Lord, that you are in a holy place and behave accordingly. The Psalm says, “Holiness adorns Your house, O Lord, forever” (Ps. 93:5). It is enough that it is called “the house of the Lord.” It was consecrated with the holy myron oil, the anointing of holiness, and the Spirit of God dwells in it—it became sanctified and dedicated to Him, just as the tabernacle of meeting was in the past. Inside it was the Holy Place, and what corresponds to the altar today was the Holy of Holies.
The first place to be consecrated and anointed with oil was “Bethel,” where the Lord appeared to our father Jacob, and he saw a ladder reaching between heaven and earth, with angels ascending and descending on it. He said, “How awesome is this place! This is none other than the house of God, and this is the gate of heaven!” (Gen. 28:17).
Everything in the house of God is holy. The sacred service vessels are used only by priests, and even the deacon touches them only with a veil. They are anointed with the holy myron, as are the censer, icons, and baptismal font. Because of the holiness of the place, the Lord said to Moses when He appeared to him in the burning bush, “Take your sandals off your feet, for the place where you stand is holy ground” (Ex. 3:5).
That is why in ancient times, people did not enter churches wearing shoes—they removed them at the door. This still happens in our monasteries. But since it became difficult to apply this rule for large crowds, removing shoes was limited to entering the sanctuary, where the holy altar and the holy sacrifice are.
In the churches I consecrated in England, America, and Australia, I consecrated only the altar, since the sanctuary is entered only by the altar servers—pure, fasting, and prepared for communion—entering barefoot, in a manner worthy of its holiness.
The church is also called the house of angels and resembles heaven. The lights in it remind us of the heavenly light and symbolize both the angels and the saints, who are “the light of the world” (Matt. 5:14). Therefore, we light candles and lamps before their icons, remembering that they were lights in the world.
The church is consecrated for prayer, for the Lord said, “My house shall be called a house of prayer” (Isa. 56:7). Thus, the Lord Christ firmly cleansed the temple when He saw it being used for purposes other than prayer.
Preparation
Therefore, entering the house of the Lord must be preceded by both spiritual and physical preparation, entering pure in soul and body. Physically, one should be bathed, dressed in clean garments, and fasting if attending the Divine Liturgy.
In ancient times, people would ascend to the house of God singing psalms—hence the “Psalms of Ascents.” At least, on your way to church, occupy your mind with prayer so your spirit is prepared and not distracted by worldly thoughts during the service.
Prepare also by repentance—with purity of heart, cleanliness of thought, and peace with others. Priests and deacons wear white garments (tunics) before the service, symbolizing purity of heart. The priest washes his hands before the Liturgy, saying, “I will wash my hands in innocence; so I will go about Your altar, O Lord” (Ps. 26:6) and “Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow” (Ps. 51:7).
Spiritual preparation is especially necessary before communion. Therefore, I do not recommend daily communion lest it become a habit and lose its reverence and preparation. The difference here lies between the priest and the layperson.
Even the altar itself is prepared with incense and prayers before the sacrifice is placed upon it—incense of Vespers, Matins, the Pauline, the Acts, and the Gospel processions—all to sanctify and prepare for the offering.
We also pray the prayer of absolution five times for the people—at Vespers, Midnight, Matins, before offering the Lamb, and privately before the final confession—remembering Samuel’s words before offering the sacrifice: “Sanctify yourselves and come with me to the sacrifice” (1 Sam. 16:5).
In the early church, not everyone was worthy to enter the church or attend the Divine Liturgy. There were excommunications, and the subdeacon guarded the doors to prevent the unworthy or those under discipline from entering. This happened, for instance, with St. Sarah before her repentance, and with the empress during the time of St. John Chrysostom.
Punctuality
It is improper to go to church late, especially after the offering of the Lamb. The Bible says, “Those who seek Me early will find Me” (Prov. 8:17), and David said, “O God, You are my God; early will I seek You” (Ps. 63:1).
In monastic tradition, monks attend Midnight Praise, then Matins, then the Divine Liturgy. You, at least, should attend from the beginning of the Liturgy.
Reverence
Let us remember the words of our father Jacob: “How awesome is this place! This is none other than the house of God, and this is the gate of heaven!” (Gen. 28:17).
In ancient times, people did not live beside churches out of reverence and fear of offending the holy place. The same reverence was shown by the Seraphim and Cherubim, as Isaiah describes: “Each one had six wings: with two he covered his face, with two he covered his feet, and with two he flew. And one cried to another and said: Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of hosts” (Isa. 6:2–4).
Reverence is shown by standing, bowing, prostrating, and guarding the senses. Sitting during prayer, especially at holy moments, is improper. Hence the deacon cries out before the Gospel: “Stand in the fear of God, and listen to the Holy Gospel,” and elsewhere, “Worship God in fear and trembling.”
Talking during prayers, sermons, or sacraments is disrespectful. Even having clubs or noisy gatherings in the church courtyard distracts from reverence.
Above all, the sanctuary deserves utmost respect—it is not for everyone to enter or speak carelessly inside. Only the Lamb should enter as an offering; no one should carry bread into it.
Order
Everything in the church should be done “decently and in order” (1 Cor. 14:40). There are specific places for priests, deacons, and the bishop’s throne. The altar is elevated, and the bishop’s chair has three steps representing his progression from deacon to priest to bishop.
Disorder, especially by children running or photographers being disruptive, breaks the sacred atmosphere. In some churches, children have separate services or rooms—sometimes called “Crying Rooms”—so that mothers can follow the Liturgy through glass without disturbing others.
Ushers and administrators should also act with calmness and courtesy, not harshly. Education and training for them are useful to maintain order.
Modesty
The house of God requires modesty in clothing, adornment, and behavior. Women should cover their hair, especially during the Liturgy and communion, and those responsible should gently guide others about head coverings and modest attire. Modesty includes guarding the senses, not letting the eyes wander or be distracted.
Silence
The church is a place for silence and listening. Talking during prayers shows a lack of concern. Even deacons should not converse among themselves about responses; such matters should be arranged beforehand. All chants and responses should be in harmony, as one voice, without discord.
Humility
Entering the church must be with humility and a sense of unworthiness, as in the parable of the tax collector (Luke 18:13). The believer should say, “But as for me, in the multitude of Your mercy I will come into Your house; in fear of You I will worship toward Your holy temple.”
Even priests, before beginning the Liturgy, pray with humility: “O Lord, You know that I am unworthy and unprepared for this holy service… but through Your mercy forgive me the sinner and grant that I may find mercy in this hour.”
If the priest says this, how much more should the people?
Other Notes
One should stand in church with a spirit of prayer, participating actively and attentively. Leaving before the blessing and dismissal is improper. The deacon should not remove his tunic before the priest removes his own.
After dismissal, one should not linger in the courtyard for idle talk, lest the spiritual benefit of the service be lost.
An article by His Holiness Pope Shenouda III, published in El-Keraza Magazine, Year 18, Issues 9–10 (March 16, 1990).
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