I Am Very Afraid of Death
I Am Very Afraid of Death
Question:
I am very afraid of death. I am afraid of the moment when the soul leaves the body. Whenever I hear that someone has died, I become very sad and depressed, and I say to myself, “Your turn is coming.” Terror takes hold of me, and I keep thinking about that hour in a way that greatly exhausts my mental state. I cannot sleep except by taking sleeping pills.
Answer:
I will tell you, my son, some information:
1- Every person must die.
Death is the end of every living person. I mean that it is his end on earth. But death is not the end of life in an absolute sense; rather, it is, more than anything else, the beginning of a life that never ends. When the soul departs from the body, the person enters this other life that has no end.
2- Your fear of death is harder than death itself.
Because even if death is difficult for a moment, by your fear you are living in that moment throughout your night and your day. Therefore, it is better not to think about the subject of death. Leave it to God, and trust that you will not die before your appointed time.
3- Also know that preparing for death protects a person from the fear of death.
If you want death not to frighten you, prepare for it… through repentance, a pure life, and reconciliation with God… so that if death overtakes you, you will pass directly to the Paradise of Bliss. As the Lord said to the repentant thief who was crucified with Him: “Today you will be with Me in Paradise” (Luke 23:43).
Therefore, we saw Simeon the Elder praying, saying: “Lord, now You are letting Your servant depart in peace, because my eyes have seen Your salvation” (Luke 2:29–30). And the Apostle Paul says: “I have a desire to depart and be with Christ, which is far better” (Philippians 1:23).
4- Read about those whose deaths were all glory and joy.
Those of whom it was said in the Scripture:
“Let me die the death of the righteous, and let my end be like his!” (Numbers 23:10).
There are people to whom angels appeared at the hour of death, or saints appeared to them. Others, at the hour of their death, had their room filled with light or with the fragrance of incense. These and those leave the present world with a smile on their faces and features of joy.
Most likely, they died while being reassured about their eternity.
God showed them what indicated their reassurance.
See what happened to Stephen, the first deacon, at the hour of his death, when “his face was like the face of an angel” (Acts 6:15). And at the time of his death, “being full of the Holy Spirit, he gazed into heaven and saw the glory of God, and Jesus standing at the right hand of God” (Acts 7:55). While they were stoning him at that time, he was occupied away from the pain of the stoning by the divine vision.
Father Peter Gayed told me about a righteous believer who worked with him in the Charity Committee at the Church of the Virgin in Zeitoun. This man returned home feeling tired and went to his bedroom after asking his wife to prepare a cup of tea for him.
While his wife was on her way to him carrying the cup of tea, she heard him saying, “Yes, O Adra, I am ready. I am coming.” She entered and found that he had just departed this life. This was after the Holy Virgin had appeared to him and asked him whether he was ready for her to take him with her… He departed this life in a holy moment.
As for the person who lives in sin, the moment of death is frightening for him.
Because he is not reassured about his eternal destiny. But if this same person repents and is reconciled with God, fear departs from his heart and from his mind.
5- Know that death is merely a bridge leading to a better world.
Better than our world, over which matter prevails, and in which sin and conflicts abound. The better world to which a person passes through death is the world of the angels and the spirits of the saints, and indeed, there is the fellowship of the Lord Himself.
Remember what the priest says in the Litany of the Departed: “For there is no death for Your servants, but rather a departure”.
Do not fear this departure, because it is a departure to something better.
6- Remember what was said about poor Lazarus: that he died and “was carried by the angels to Abraham’s bosom” (Luke 16:22).
My advice to you, then—as a remedy for all your fears—is to live a righteous life with God. And remember the saying of Saint Isaac: “The righteous man desires death as others desire life”.
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