Priestly Service

The Priestly Father: A Blessing, and One Who Blesses

The Priestly Father: A Blessing, and One Who Blesses

It is not required of the priest only to bless, but also to be a blessing.
This is what the Lord said to our father Abraham, the father of the fathers, at the beginning of his calling: “I will bless you and make your name great; and you shall be a blessing… And in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed” (Genesis 12:2–3). In the same way, Elijah was a blessing in the house of the widow of Zarephath of Sidon, and by his blessing to her in the days of famine, “the bin of flour was not used up, nor did the jar of oil run dry, until the day the Lord sent rain on the earth” (1 Kings 17:14, 16).
Likewise, Elisha was a blessing in the house of the Shunammite woman.
How beautiful is what was said about Joseph the righteous while he was in the house of Potiphar: “The Lord blessed the Egyptian’s house for Joseph’s sake; and the blessing of the Lord was on all that he had in the house and in the field” (Genesis 39:5).

Thus the priest should be a blessing in every place he enters.
This is the faith of the people regarding the blessing of the priestly father.
They seek the blessing of his prayer for them, as happened with Hannah when she was asking the Lord to give her a son while she was fasting. When she heard from Eli the priest the words, “Go in peace, and the God of Israel grant your petition which you have asked of Him,” “the woman went her way and ate, and her face was no longer sad” (1 Samuel 1:18), and the Lord fulfilled the prayer of the priest for her, and she gave birth to Samuel.

Thus people resort to the priestly father asking for his blessing and his prayers in their problems and in their sickness. Students come to him before their exams asking for his prayers and blessing.
They even seek the blessing of anything from him: the blessing of the cross, or an icon, or a pen with which they write, or the blessing of his signature on a book or on a picture, or even the blessing of the hem of his garment.

The priest blesses the people in many ways:
He blesses them by making the sign of the cross, or by sprinkling water prayed over, or by anointing them with oil, or by a word of blessing he says, or by placing his hand on their heads. He blesses them in the ecclesiastical rite with the phrase Irene pasi (“Peace be with you all”). He also blesses their homes by visiting them, by praying in the house, or by offering incense in it. He blesses food by prayer and the sign of the cross. He blesses their work and their projects, and he blesses their children.
The priest blesses his fellow priest and receives blessing from him, and he asks for his blessing before beginning liturgical prayer in the church.
People receive blessing from the priestly father through their obedience to him.
As the well-known proverb says: “The son of obedience receives blessing, and the disobedient’s state is ruined.” Jacob and Esau competed in every way to receive the blessing of their father Isaac.
Joseph the righteous asked his father Jacob to bless his two sons Ephraim and Manasseh, and as Jacob placed his hands on both of them, the blessing came to each according to what Jacob pronounced.
The phrase “Bless me, my father” is very well known in the books of the monastic fathers.

The Priest as a Father of Confession

Confession is the condemnation of the self before God, in the hearing of the priest.
Forgiveness in confession is granted by God to the repentant, from the mouth of the priest.
Therefore, in confession, the penitent comes repentant and remorseful for his sins, confessing these sins. He sits with the priestly father not to tell stories or report news, but to mention what he has committed of error or sin within what he recounts of events.

Confession is one of the Church’s sacraments, which we call the sacrament of repentance. Those who confess are therefore supposed to be repentant, offering their repentance to God in the hearing of the priest.
God, then, is an essential element in confession, and confession is not merely a relationship between the priestly father and the confessor.

For all this, I would like to say to the father of confession the following notes regarding the confession session:

The Confession Session

1. The confession session should be calm and dignified, befitting one of the Church’s sacraments, and it is good that it be in the church. If you are compelled to hear it in the confessor’s home, do not listen to confessions while you are drinking something, and do not allow it in any way to turn into a casual social gathering.
2. Many fathers begin the confession session with prayer and conclude it with prayer, and by this they make the confessor feel the reverence of the time of confession, and they ask for God’s presence and help.
3. If the confession is in the church, it should not be in a closed room, but in an open place, especially when hearing the confessions of women and girls.
4. In the confession session, there should be no undue familiarity between you and the confessor, no matter how much affection or friendship exists between you. Make him feel that he is before God, speaking in your presence.
5. Do not accustom confessors to come to your house for confession, because the house of the priestly father has its own privacy. It is not yours alone, but also that of your wife and children, who live their private lives there, without being exposed to confessors who may comment as they wish, and crowd the house waiting for their turn.
6. Try to help the confessor to open his heart. There is no harm in directing some questions to him as elements of confession, but not in a way that opens his mind to things he does not know.
7. Do not suffice with hearing sins only; you must also ask him about the positives, regarding the practice of the means of grace and his spiritual growth as well.
8. Do not rebuke him for everything he says, lest he become afraid or ashamed, withdraw into himself, and fail to reveal the rest of what he wants to say about his life.
9. Do not try in the confession session to squeeze the confessor to extract everything from him, for this exhausts him greatly. Confession is a virtue in which the confessor progresses; he may not disclose certain things at first, or may mention them vaguely or hint at them. When his soul is reassured, when he matures in spirituality and knowledge, and when he succeeds in resisting his shyness, he will mention them later.
10. You should explain the confessor’s errors and guide him to a practical and possible way of getting rid of them.
11. Know that the confession session is not merely the hearing of errors; it also includes guidance—guiding the confessor to the right path he should walk. There is no harm in giving him spiritual exercises suitable to his level and circumstances.
12. Do not give the same guidance to all confessors, for what suits some may not suit others. Souls differ in their conditions, and confessors are not all at the same level; the beginner is different from the growing, and from the mature.
13. Do not involve confessors in your own personal problems, nor speak to them about troubles you have with the church council, with servants, or with some of your fellow clergy—both so as not to cause them to stumble, and because your duty is to carry their burdens and solve their problems, not to involve them in yours.
14. In your guidance, do not burden anyone with what is beyond his capacity. Saint Paul himself said to the Corinthians: “As to carnal, as to babes in Christ. I fed you with milk and not with solid food; for until now you were not able to receive it” (1 Corinthians 3:1–2).
15. Give hope to those who have no hope, and open a window of light for the despairing, the weary, and the fallen. Do not drag him downward with rebukes and punishments, but listen to the Apostle’s saying: “Comfort the fainthearted, uphold the weak, be patient with all” (1 Thessalonians 5:14).
16. If it is necessary to impose a discipline on a sinner, let it be within his capacity, with explanation and persuasion, so that he feels it is for his benefit and spiritual good.
17. In your guidance, do not try to make the confessor a copy of you in your spiritual life, walking according to your own style. His direction in life may be different from yours, his abilities different from yours, and the nature of his soul different from the nature of your soul.
18. In the confession session, do not ask the confessor about matters outside the topic of confession in order to learn secrets of others, exceeding your role as a father of confession.
19. Do not force the confessor into a particular path by the authority of the priesthood in binding and loosing. Your work is to guide and persuade, not to coerce and dominate. God Himself gives us commandments, yet does not force us to walk in them.
20. If the confessor asks you during confession about a spiritual or social question whose answer you do not know, do not give any answer that may be unsound. It is better to postpone the answer until you study the matter well. The same applies if he confesses doubts in theological or doctrinal matters. Do not give an unconvincing answer; you may refer him to a useful book that contains the sound answer, or postpone your response until you can study the matter well.
21. Be long-suffering in guiding the soul. You may advise the confessor with beneficial counsel, but his will or circumstances may not help him to implement it. Do not be angry with him, do not rebuke him harshly, and do not lose patience with him. Perhaps your patience with him and your prayers for him will help him.
22. Be just in distributing your time among confessors. Do not allow one of them to take all your time and attention while others do not enjoy the same care and time.
23. It is good to follow up with the confessor regarding his spiritual life and the extent to which he implements the advice and exercises, studying with him the obstacles he encounters and how to overcome them.
24. Ask about the one who is absent from confession sessions, make him feel your care, and check on him.

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