The Position of the Parents
The Position of the Parents
Last week we spoke about the importance of the condition of agreement between the spouses, and here we wish to speak about:
The Position of the Parents.
The role of the parents in the engagement of their daughter or their son lies in presentation and guidance; it cannot reach the point of imposition or compulsion.
It is their right to refuse a spouse whom they do not find suitable, but it is not their right to impose another.
Even in refusal, it should be based on sound foundations and reasons that warrant it.
In the matter of marriage and in other matters, let the parents remember the saying of the Scripture:
“Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged” (Col. 3:21).
Some parents impose a fiancé through violence and control, or through sorrow, anger, and illness, compelling the son or daughter to accept out of concern for the health of his father or mother. The parents may also refuse a fiancé through suspicion, accusing their daughter, for example, that she rejects this fiancé because she is in a relationship with another person… They may also impose someone through continual insistence and by rejecting the rest of the proposals.
All kinds of imposition cannot produce a successful marriage. A successful marriage is built upon harmony, consent, and love.
The father and mother may impose one of their relatives (a cousin, the son of a sister) or one of the family’s friends, or a wealthy person who costs them nothing in the marriage, or someone who has a position or culture that pleases them, etc.
But let the parents remember that they are not choosing what suits themselves, but rather what suits their son or their daughter.
It is the life of the one who will marry, not the life of the one who chooses.
For better translation support, please contact the center.
