Concepts

Rules of Reproof

Rules of Reproof

Some may resort to reproving others, in accordance with the words of Saint Paul the Apostle to his disciple Timothy the bishop: “Convince, rebuke, exhort” (2 Tim. 4:2). Concerning such reproof, we set forth some observations:

1. Does the one who rebukes have the authority to rebuke, as Saint Timothy the bishop did? Is the person being rebuked under his spiritual responsibility? Is he younger or older than him?
2. What is the manner of the reproof? Is it with harshness and violence? Is it in a wounding and humiliating way? Is it in a repelling manner?

The Apostle Paul said to the priests of Ephesus: “Remember that for three years I did not cease to warn everyone night and day with tears” (Acts 20:31).

3. Therefore, if you rebuke someone, let it be with humility and love. Do not rebuke with domination, nor with arrogance and pride. Let the reproof take the form of gentle counsel, not of wounding reproach.
4. Do not rebuke—those under your authority—for every mistake…

For the prophet David says to the Lord: “If You, Lord, should mark iniquities, O Lord, who could stand? But there is forgiveness with You” (Ps. 130:3–4).

Rebuking for every error causes others to fall into discouragement, and you may appear to them as one who is hunting for their faults…

5. Do not rebuke in front of others, for this carries an element of embarrassment.

Scripture makes an exception to this rule in the case of sins that are publicly known. Concerning those who sin carelessly before all, the apostle says: “Those who are sinning rebuke in the presence of all, that the rest also may fear” (1 Tim. 5:20).

But sins that occur in secret should be rebuked in secret.

6. Let your reproof be with conviction and love…

Convince the one you rebuke that you love him and are concerned for him, and that you speak for his benefit. Let your rebuke not proceed from enmity or contempt.

7. Reproof may be given indirectly:

With more suggestion than direct statement. Or it may be given positively, by explaining the benefits of the opposite spiritual path to what has occurred.

8. Reproof may be preceded by praise and followed by encouragement.

The Lord Himself followed this method with the Samaritan woman, without wounding her (John 4:17–18).

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