Meditations on the Song of Songs-By night, on my bed
Meditations on the Song of Songs
The spiritual read this book and their love for God increases… but the carnal need a guide when reading it, lest they misunderstand it and descend from its sublime meaning to worldly interpretations…
Today we continue our meditation on the verse of the Song:
“By night on my bed I sought him whom my soul loves; I sought him, but I found him not.”
(Song 3:1)
By night, on my bed
It is possible that the word night symbolizes sin in its darkness and concealment.
Therefore, believers are called children of light and children of the day, for they work in the light, performing radiant and luminous deeds…
As for the phrase on my bed, it may symbolize sleep and laziness.
Here, we refer to the human soul, that when it is far from the Lord—in the state of sin and sloth—it seeks Him whom it loves but does not find Him.
Night is not always entirely dark or pitch black; sometimes it has lights—the light of the sky, the stars, and the moon.
These lights in the night give the spirit awakening and the conscience illumination, so that even in the depth of sin, the soul begins to seek the Lord, as the prodigal son sought his father’s house while in a far country.
Therefore, it was good that the Lord created the moon and stars to give light to the night.
Whenever we remember that the Lord visited the night in its darkness and created the moon and stars to lighten it or to lessen its gloom, we are comforted.
Blessed are You, O Lord, for You are not only the God of the day but also the God of the night. Despite its darkness, Your care does not abandon it.
Without Your care for the night, I could not say in my sin, “By night on my bed, I sought him whom my soul loves.”
It is as if this soul says to the Lord: Truly I am in the night, yet I am not far from You. Darkness may surround me outwardly, but Your Spirit still shines within me.
I am in the night, but beyond this night there must be dawn, and beyond it, day. I may be in the life of sin, or lukewarmness, or laziness, yet I still seek Him whom my soul loves.
Do not despair, O Lord, of this night, for it is not wholly dark. And even if it is, You are able to enlighten it, O True Light.
I commit sin, yet I do not love it; rather, I love You. As Your Apostle Paul said:
“For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do.”
(see Romans 7:15–20)
I am on my bed, asleep, but my heart is awake. On my bed, yet I seek Him whom my soul loves.
I am on my bed—perhaps unable to rise—but You can raise me Yourself.
This bed is not a permanent place; it is a temporary stage in my life that must end with the passing of this night. I am in rebellion against this bed. I lie upon it, but in my ears echoes the psalmist’s cry: “Arise, O children of the light, let us praise the Lord of Hosts.”
“I sought him whom my soul loves; I sought him, but I found him not…”
I do not find Him, yet I still seek Him.
He is not present with me—I do not feel Him in my life—but He is present in my heart; I sense Him in my desires.
My deprivation of God makes me seek Him all the more. I am not content with this deprivation. I am not one of those who “loved darkness rather than light because their deeds were evil.”
Though my deeds may be evil, I do not love the darkness.
I may sin out of weakness or inability, by force of habit, or under external pressure—but I do not love sin.
I struggle to be free of it—or even if I do not struggle, I still desire deliverance. I would rejoice if the Lord rescued me from it, and salvation came to the household of my soul.
“By night on my bed, I sought him whom my soul loves…”
It may be that this was a visitation of grace that came to my heart. Perhaps it was the work of Your Holy Spirit, which You have not taken from me.
It may have been a revolt within me against the sin that crushed me upon my bed…
It could be any of these things, or something else—whether by my will or by Your divine prompting.
Whether I spoke, or Your Spirit spoke through me—the certain truth is that I seek You with all my heart.
And whenever I am deprived of You and do not find You, I seek You all the more.
Article by His Holiness Pope Shenouda III – El-Keraza Magazine – Year Six (Issue 23), June 6, 1975.
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